What I Understand

It seems as though life has a quirky sense of humor. You are born as an innocent little peace of heaven into a world of uncertainty, turmoil, lessons and journeys to accomplish with no instructions on how to get through the maze. So, as a little mouse trying to find it's way through all the turns, dead ends and seemingly unending tunnels; you proceed on your journey to find your piece of cheese or way out to get back home and out of the tortuous maze.

First you have to get through learning how to survive, sleep regularly, communicate your needs to a world of sounds and garble (that you don't understand yet) and aren't able to communicate back; to a full understanding of what it is that you are wanting or needing. How completely difficult and insane is this world of learning when you first start out here not even able to tell someone what you need?! On top of all of that, you must learn how to maneuver yourself enough to get from one place to another which seems to be the most difficult of tasks for a human. The first part is just learning how to roll over from your back to your belly (which is such a hard task and puts those muscles through the ringer). Then when you have fully learned to do that, then you have to learn how to move about by either crawling on all fours, scooting on your butt, pulling yourself across the floor with your hands, the one foot pull-hop-bounce across the floor, the crab crawl and finally some do the twist and scoot. Then the really strenuous task of learning the balancing act after learning to pull yourself up to a standing position without falling back down and boucing off your plump little biscuits padded with a diaper thank goodness. When you're all excited about making it upright, you try to take the so very scary but adventurous first step....only to get your pride hurt again by bouncing down onto that horrible floor you're trying so hard to get away from. But, you still keep trying because you see all the other people standing on their two feet and gliding across the floor so quickly and you wonder why? Why?! Why can't I just stay up and do this? Why is this so very hard to do? Then, one day, without understanding really how you accomplished this nor will you ever really know or remember how. You finally take those magnificent steps to freedom with a big smile on your face full of pride in your accomplishment and you're expecting everyone to glorify in your success. I truly don't know why, but it seems we were given the short end of the stick as far as being able to start right from the womb and take off running or walking and communicating. That just doesn't seem fair to have such a sick joke played upon us from the very start. But, we seem to finally get through those first stages and then never remember how we actually accomplished them in the first place. I guess we will find out when we finally get back home and watch the video of our entire lives here....lol. Still so not fair.

Once you have finally accomplished these tasks, you then have to learn how to get a long in this world with other people around you and make your way through the family and friends connections and also learning to cope with the bullies and deceitful people as well. You are sent to schools to learn skills such as communicating with others, manners, what not to say to another person, what you should say, how to eat, drink, act in public, how to look a way that is acceptable to others because if you don't, then you are picked on and out-casted. If you think or feel a different way from the group, you also are ostracized. Why can't people just get along in this world with the understanding that we all have our own journeys to complete and lessons to learn before we are called home again? We all come from a place of complete and unconditional Love and we should realize that we are all a part of the same creator source (God) and we are all equal. No matter what your skin color, gender, race, etc. No matter what your Religion is or how you practice your connection to God (whether it be through prayer or meditation or simply being out in nature). We all come from the same place and return there once we are finished here. So, why not try to just be accepting of others, be loving and kind and helpful and try to learn compassion.

In our life journeys and lessons we come across so many obstacles and I find that they are a part of our learning process (whether we like them or not). So, sometimes they are very pleasant and happy and fun and sometimes they are very hard and cruel. Each has a purpose for us for our own learning that we need to accomplish. I have come across lots of happy lessons and then difficult ones both. My happy lessons were my family, friends (Dear ones), marriage, my son, my granddaughter, learning new things and my pets and nature. Being allowed time in this life is such a blessing in itself. The hard lessons that I have had to learn have been ever so difficult for me to learn. I had to learn about trust and relationships and who are the people that want the best for you, who want to control you and who want to hurt you. Some people deceive you and lie constantly and manipulate you to the point that you don't know what is really right or not. You're so deep in the middle of the forest that you don't see the light and truth outside of it. Once you find your way through the thickness of the woods and start seeing the light. It takes you time to really trust what it is that you see or hear. Some people still try to use you or befriend you for information but don't truly want to be your friend (even though you always have tried to be their friend). That is a sad part of learning. So relationship lessons are hard ones. The other hard lessons are those of loss. I have had many of those lessons and they are so very very difficult to get passed (especially when you're so close to the person or persons). Sometimes you don't think or feel like you can ever live without them here in your life. But, you have to keep reminding yourself that you will see them again and that they are watching over you and waiting for you to return home also one day. Therefore, you need to complete your life lessons and journey here before you go back home taking those lessons with you and experiences to share.

The other hard lessons are those of difficulties in your life as far as health issues go and financial issues. I've been at both ends of the financial poles so many times in my life that it no longer fazes me as to whether I have a lot of money or barely making a scratch in the dirt to find food. Therefore, that lesson I believe I have learned fairly well. The health issues I am still struggling with on my own (even though others have it worse than myself, I know). I keep having more obstacles to deal with that seem to come up either at a gradual pace or sometimes all at once. I mean, like having a car accident that debilitates you to the point that you can no longer hold a regular job, causes you constant daily pain and mobility issues. Then you have debilitating headaches, hearing loss in one ear with constant annoying painful Tinnitus, on top of that you find out that you have Glaucoma after going in for a routine eye exam and they don't let you leave because you have serious eye pressure that is considered and emergency case and needs to be reduced or you will become blind. Your told that you may have to have laser eye surgery immediately (then you realize that you drove yourself to your appointment) to reduce the pressure. Luckily you are told that you do not have the closed or narrow angle Glaucoma but the Open Angle Glaucoma (which by the way is worse because it is not curable), Then they tell you that there is no cure for this disease and you have to have treatments for the rest of your life or go blind and then even with treatments, you may go blind anyway. How unfortunate is that for news? Very scary situation and you want to call your Mom to tell her about the news (then you remember that you can't and you start crying because she is gone from this life).  Plus, after you have your physical and your blood work done; you are told that you have Pre-Diabetes and--- also one of your Liver tests has come back HIGH so they need to discuss that with you also. Luckily after the MRI for the hearing loss, I found out that I do not have any tumors causing the loss. But, it will continue to get worse over time. It seems that the lessons continue. But, once past the learning of these lessons; I know that in the end I will go home with so much knowledge about my life's journey in this world to share with others as they share theirs with me. There (in our forever home) I, as well as everyone else there; will no longer be in pain or suffer from our lessons from this life. That......... Is a Blessing Indeed. :)